Archive for July 2008
For the best new blog on the block, and a sneak peek into the sexual shenanigans of suburban South Africa, check out Bangers and Mash. Compellingly nasty reading!
I don´t want Harry´s sleep to be further disturbed, but I do hope the Saucemeister gets it up again soon. He really is the man – performing not only for the pleasure of the Screamer, but several interweb voyeurs as well!
1. Why do I always start sneezing whenever I pluck my eyebrows?
3. Why does Graeme Smith so often put the other team in to bat? It only makes it worse on the rare occasion that it´s the correct decision, as this lets him justify all the other times when it´s so obviously the wrong one.
Whosoever can answer any of these burning questions shall be the recipient of my eternal gratitude!
Dick-the-barman: “What are you doing here?”
T: “I´m down from Jozi for the weekend.”
Dick-the-barman: “Oh, I thought you were out on a day pass from Valkenburg.”
T: “Actually, the last time I was in a psychiatric institution was in Switzerland.”
Dick-the-barman: “It´s hard to know how to respond to that.”
Dick-the-barman virtually speechless – a rare occasion, which banished all vestiges of depression from my psyche 😉
If you have a five-litre jug and a three-litre jug, how do you get four litres? Or, if you take one set of parents and a 20-something who’s returned to the nest, how do you get a book out of it?
T: “It’s very fashionable to write books about one’s parents these days. Everybody is doing it.”
Pim: “I know, you told me the other day.”
T: “I just thought I’d mention it again.”
Pim: “If you wrote one about us, no one would read it; it would be boring.”
T: “No, it wouldn’t; it would be hilarious.”
Pim: “I suppose you could put a different jug problem in italics at the beginning of each chapter.”
Mim: “Don’t encourage her!”
GX: “So, you’re a fan of James?”
T: “James the band?”
GX: “No, James my friend.”
T: “Dude, I was being facetious!” 😉
Mel: “You’re so tiny.”
J: “Mom, don’t be rude.”
G: “At least you’re the same height as me!”
T: “How old are you?”
G: “Nine. How old are you?”
T: “Um, 28.”
Good thing I don’t have a complex about my height…
T: “So we can go and book my learner´s tomorrow?”
Mim: “No, I told you we´re going in the opposite direction.”
T: “Surely it´s not that far? The longer we wait to do it the longer I´ll be at your mercy.”
Mim: “No, the longer I´ll be at your mercy.”
T: “I guess we´ll both be at each other´s mercy… Or throats.”